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dominating and egoistic husband. my husband is very dominating and never consider my feelings. Its

by Guest10403627  |  10 years, 3 month(s) ago

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my husband is very dominating and never consider my feelings. Its always about him, we have a 9 month old baby. its been 4 years we have been married and I have never been happy since then, after few days of marriage my husband told me the reason he married me (can't disclose) I am ugly looking and he and his family always wanted a pretty wife. I didn't spoke about it to my mom or dad as my dad was going thru life threatining illness and my mom was trying to make the ends meet. They had lost their house and moved into an apartment so I really didn't want to give them more tension and stress. I was depresses and always thinking about it, i tried to do things that would make him happy, being financially secure make him really happy so i tried to work two jobs and even tried to join gym but I was so stressed because of my husbands attitude and at the same time my dad's health, with all this stress I ended up with deceased gallbladdeder that later had to be removed. After a while we moved to the eastern side of United states, got good jobs, bought a house and then my dad passed away, it was not easy for me and my family but my husband was not supportive at all, then with new jobs we got financially secured and my husband went on vacations with me, because that what he wanted, I am sure he would go with someone else if he had another options, I got pregnant, he was not very supportive during my pregnancy, when my son was born, the blame game started as to my mother doesn't help much taking care of the baby and his mother came from back home to help us, looking at my mother's situation, she is a widower, my sister is in high school, she is working, paying her rent and taking care of my sister, how can babysit my son while we are at work, I wanted to help my parents financially, but couldn't as I have no money with me its all joint and he doesn't like me to help them. even if i have to buy on lipstick i have to tell him where i spent the money. Now its just that I don't need a husband but my son needs a father. I want to raise my son the right way so he grow up and respect women.

 Tags: Dominating, egoistic, husband

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9 ANSWERS

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  2. Guest27872870

    Our marriage has been 9 years. We still have no kids. He has a kind heart, I know, because he does a lot of things for orphanages and hospitals, but his personality is dominating, especially with me, so it is difficult for me to leave him. As I am confused. He does not dominate me every minute, but sometimes the situation is too bad. And now I feel it’s part of his personality which he cannot change. He wants things to be exactly his way, and my ways and opinions are always the dumbest thing to do on earth. I have tried my best to please him with my cooking, doing things exactly his way.  But right now I am just exhausted, and I feel I cannot take it any more.Please advice.

  3. Guest22536741

    This world consists of major part of people with frequently changing minds.In this situation,a women needs financial security all the time...first self-respect is very important and no need to be a slave ..there are lot of ooportunities in this world..its better to leverage skills and can try to shape one's career...one or two or three times can be forgiven...but this continues then that becomes the routine..there is a limit for everything and if any one crosses then the other partner also need to cross inorder to maintain self respect..God is always there for the good..

  4. Guest22059895

    hi .. even i am also in the same situation. i have 4 years old son, my husband is very stingy and egoistic person.he never respected my feelings or my emotions and he openly says that "if u want to stay with me accept me as i am or else u r free to move out of life!" . from past 7 years my life has become an h**l , many times i thought of taking divorce from him but my parents are typical indians and they don't want her daughter marrital status to be declared as "DIVORCEE", and also i feel my child needs a father's love and care ( though my husband rarely shows care about my son). i am living with him just because of my parents and my son. He is so self centerd that he never thinks about his partner needs.I am not able to understand how to show him his mistakes/responsibilities. pls anybody help me 

     

  5. Guest13138353
    You just need to speak to him and find out whether he is interested to live with you, in case the answer is yes, then let him know that you are an independent lady, needs no support from anyone, only thing expected out of him is allow you to lead the life with respect, and if he agrees to it go ahead to live with him, if not as I said you are an independent person, remember every woman are strong enough to care for themselves. Good luck :))
  6. Guest12449497
    leave that basterd let him go to h**l. tk care of yr child . good day
  7. Guest12271634
    I have been in the same situation. But I am a stay home mom of my 2 children. I have no job and no income. And I am scared to divorce. My husband is very defensive and always put his needs first. I am unhappy and need help.
  8. Guest11970864
    I could imagine how do you feel when your husband have ego attacks and you trynig to keep the marriage,the father of your child and to avoid discussion surely ,you bite your tonque because that's the only way to survive.Do you think your child will not be affected by this war? Sooner,the baby grows up and before you knew it ,both of you have to be slaves for your husband because he will also dominate your child. My advise is,"You talk this problem with him seriously and if he does not want to listen, you must only ask yourself who you love most. Raising a child needs a lot of caring and love. Although a father is a big figure, he has also a big influence on him and the tendency is either the child copies the father or becomes unhappy with such a kind of environment. It is not healthy to continue such relationship because you are trying to delay his decision by letting him do what he pleases. You deserve to be happy and so is your child. Dont forget in America, child abuse is rampant physically and most of all mentally. Do you really need your husband financially, because if you can raise your child alone it would be better for your own safety and your child. Talk to him, show him that you need respect. Take charge of the situation, be strong for your child, in a household, there is no room for egoism. Dont be afraid. We have a moral obligation to our children and that starts from parents. If there is no love from your hubands part then he does not deserve you nor your child. Men by nature are polygamous, a woman is only a furniture to be used and to dominate,this kind of men dont have the right to exist. You said you are ugly, wel I believe your husband is blind not to see the beauty in you.You dont have to be the first one to ask divorce, just talk it out and he will decide if divorce is the best, then give his freedom. You dont need him. I hope you still have self-respect left? Use your head not your heart. Thank for this opportunity that I can help in this way. Good luck!!!
  9. Guest10670200
    I am in the same situation.I dont know waht to do.I got two kids and cant live with the dominating husbanf.Please help me to sort out the situation.

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