You bet. But in a similar situation, I called my sons friends Dads, they came over and each of us spanked our own sons first, then took turns spanking the other boys. We used our belts on their butts, lots of crying, sobbs and sorry's, with very sore asses to go home and think about what they did
he's lucky he didn't get punched in the face! you did the right thing
i think that you did the right thing he went out of the house with out you knowing his friends were out with him i personally would have spanked his friends too i am 27 and i was spanked alot by my friends parents but unfortunatlly we cant do that now that we are parents our selves my daughter went down the street with her friends and she is 11 and i spanked her infront of her friends and called their parents and their parents spanked their kids too
Maybe the reason he is running out at night is because he has an abusive mom. This was totally out of line and you should be ashamed of yourself.
Yes, you were right. He deserved punishment and 12-year-old boy may be spanked in front friends, if all were boys. You had no to spank him on the bare bottom in front girls, of course.
Yes it was wrong You can and should be charged with sexual assault 12 year old is too old to pull down his pants .
At 12 would you have your father do this in front of a group of girls
Well i think it is fine you punished behavior. I think the pulling down his pants part could be bad if one of his friends spilled the beans to his parents and they mistook that as something else (as sad as it is there are parents that think everything is wrong).
I would have also called each of the parents to comepick up their child at 3AM.
You couldn't find a belt or stick? He more than deserved it.
I have boys 11 and 15.... there are teen boys at my home constantly. Their parents know that I will punish their children too. Sad thing is...they don't tell their parents if I punish them...they know that they would get it again! ( from their parents)
Lol he deserved it- he needs to learn to respect girls... But I wouldn't do it again- you probably got the point across that it could happen.
it was so wrong 2 do he is 12 12 year olds do that just punish him and tell him not 2 do it again or punishment will b worse
No i dont think it was for you to do. Your son deserved it . Sneaking out at night,to meet some girls,and comes at three in morning. I would have done the same thing if I had a son who did that to me.Plus it doesn't matter how old you are. And no it's not exactly child abuse
i would have handled it differently...i would have confronted the boys to tell the parents about sneaking out or you would..i'm afraid your son will only be mocked
wow that was very wrong. youshould have grounded him or something. but definetely not spanked him in front of his friends. and btw spankings dont hurt after youre like 11. lol. so ya that was probably useless.
Next time use the wire end of the swatter, it will hurt more.
Do you think you kid will sneak out of your house again?
no it was the right response, and spanking isn't illegal. He might not like you for a bit, but you are his MOM NOT His Friend! When will parents understand that, as you obviously do?
No, sounds to me like he deserved it, and the embarassment of having it happen in front of his friends probably taught him more that the spanking itself.
Yeah I think that's wrong of you.
You shouldn't spank him with or without his friends there.
He will be so humiliated because of it and his friends will think you are a bit of a psycho and probably won't come round again.
I know he shouldn't be sneaking out, but I think that that was really harsh.
Couldn't you have just grounded him or some other conventional punishment? It's not like he hurt anyone.
At least you showed him not to mess with you.. But i'm sure you could have dealt with it differently.. I.E. not in front of his friends? But then again you were angry at the time!
For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction and the reaction your son may have to you hitting and humiliating him is not something he's just going to have right now. He's going to remember that you did that to him in 10 years, 20 years and so on, and his opposite reaction could be to be the better for it, but much more likely he'll have a subconscious desire to humiliate others. His friends are going to be making fun of him for this for a while most likely, and will tell other friends. Right now he can't hit back or humiliate someone like that, but in the future he will be able to.
I think you made a horrible decision. I've never laid a hand on my daughters and they are sweet, hardworking, honest girls. I would never humiliate them like you did.
YOU behaved like a child. You were upset and instead of behaving like an adult with the prudence to wait until you'd gotten a bit of sleep and calmed down, you reacted at the moment, and hit and humiliated your child.
You need to grow up.
I think that your did the right thing, because if I was to do that my mother would've done the same thing. So you should be proud of your self for being a great mother.
p.s- your son might be a little piss of at you though for embarrassing him in from of his friends.
p.s- for Lou S that is not child abuse it's called discipline your children. Something that most parents these days don't do.
12 times.? in front of his friends.? i could understand 5 times not in front of his friends...but i think yo went a little overboard...your scarring him and embarrasing him in front of his friends. its true, he needs to learn his lesson, but not by humiliation. please think about this...
what if he goes to school and has no more friends, or nobody wants to talk to him because they think his mom is abusive.?
Omg! my friend (who is extremely stupid) has snuck out so many times and her parents caught her and the only thing that her mom does is takes away the computer and cellphone. Im 14 and there should be a severe punishment for that! You should have spanked his friends! i cant believe everyone is sneaking out now! Wild children out there!
im glad you spanked hhim because he needed it
Well I can understand why you're mad, but I think you could've handled it better. Spanking, especially in front of friends, probably embarrassed him.
I think that was extreme. I would be partial to spanking kids at that age, but the effects of the spanking is just not as effective as it was when they were younger.
I understand that you were angry. Who wouldn't be to find out your kid snuck out. However, if you must punish him with pain, then I would have probably just gave him one swift hit to the butt.
Now, with your pants down, bending over swats, you embarassed him in front of his friends. He is at the age where social acceptance is developing. And you just supposedly ruined it for him. It's going to take awhile for you to gain the trust back from him.
Grounding would have been fine. Taking away a priveledge would have been fine. Spanking 12 times was extreme.
You took HIM into the basement ... but spanked him "in front of his friends". Were they in the basement too, watching? At 12, it should have been his DAD that would do the spanking ... esp. if it were on the bare. Like most groups, wouldn't each of his friends have gotten a dozen also?
.
How many girls were there in "a girls house"? They snuck out too?
12 year olds ... 3 am ... where were the parents???
[From what I've heard, not many years ago the girls' dad would have "tore up" your son's butt and his friends' butts ... so that you and your husband would have had to wait until after they got released from 'intensive care' at the hospital!]
WOW
well what he did was wrong
but like it's ok to kinda spank him but like,
not infront of his friends
that must be reallyy embarassing
and it could effect his umm im not sure what it's called (SORRY FOR MY GRAMMAR)
it's called like, social status? or something like when he goes to school?
again sorry im not thinking right..
OMG! You spanked your 12-year-old son in front of his friends?
Forever, from now on, he will always be known as the spanked boy. Congratulations, if your goal was to raise someone who's going to be picked on until he leaves school.
At least you've assured that the girls are never going to have anything to do with him again, eh?
That was just wrong.
Yes, he needs to be punished, but like that?
Maybe a month's grounding plus extra chores, but that?
i'm all for spanking....but i think that was a little unnecessary. kids always do stuff like that. a good talking to would be nice, and calling those kids parents. but spanking him in front of his friends, and with a fly swatter?? now that's just cruel. i don't think i would ever forgive my mom if she did that to me.
Humiliation seems to work, but I doubt you can do that before he's bigger than you! As long as it worked, I'm down for it. I hope you told the other kids' parents, too.
Are you making a habit of this? If so, that's abuse.
He's 12. I don't know if he has the good judgment that that was the wrong thing to do. You should have talked to him about it, and set ground rules for sleepovers. Spanking him is a mideval discipline that will either have a positive or a very negative outcome. Instead of "whoopin" him, try taking away privelages the next time he does that.
Why couldn't you do it in private.Just call the kid's mothers and have them do the same.Is that so hard.He's gonna be emotionally scared for life.
ok well honestlyyy, if its his first time doing this, then maybe that was harsh. it would have been better if u didnt do it in front of his friends though! then it would have been completely fine! but he probably learned his lesson.
umm i don't think it was wrong to spank, i would be pissed too.... but you might have ruined him forever in front of his friends he may now have low self esteem.... but you didnt know... just talk to him.. he might be getting made fun of and that sucks.
sorry.....
well im 14 now and my mum has never ever spanked me and i hgave grown up too be very mature young lady and respect my mom, if my mom spanked me i would have walked out and lived with my dad (they're divorced)
but its your son and if the punishment worked then good on you, but, 12 times? maybe a few too many and not in front of his friends 'cause he may get bullied now.
Definitely not! I'm surprised he didn't spank you back. Someone needs to spank you more often. In my opinion, a loving mother wouldn't deal with her kids that way. If you can't lecture him or talk to him respectfully, I'm won't be surprised if he already hates you by now. If you want to raise him properly, treat him how you'll want to treated before it's too late. Child abuse is not the way to go.
To spank a 12 year old boy in front of his peers is too extreme.YES he should be punished.I would have called all of their parents to take them home.I would totally ground my son and take things away.To be humilated like that in front of his friends will do nothing but make him a target for kids to make fun of and tease him.Kids can be so mean.I work in a junior high,I see how quick they can turn on a friend.If nothing else the spanking should have been done in private.